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2023-11-11 We Gotta Talk About This [7JaCHQiTY9U].txt

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+Stop where you are.
+How did you access this feed?
+This stream requires level five security clearance.
+I'm just kidding.
+This is pre-recorded video.
+I can't do anything.
+Former Apple product designers have launched the Humane AI pin.
+It's essentially a $700 GPT-4 powered shirt dongle
+with cell service, cameras, and a laser projector.
+But it may not be as stupid as it looks.
+Humane's founders are former Apple exec,
+Bethany Bongiorno, Bongiorno, something,
+and designer Imran Chaudhri,
+who going by his website,
+apparently did nothing for 20 years but file patents.
+That may explain why he looks like he needs a nap all the time.
+Humane says the pin doesn't run apps.
+It simply accomplishes whatever you tell it to using AI,
+but its camera and mics are not always recording.
+You have to tap it and you'll hear audio come out of its personic speaker,
+creating an intimate bubble of sound,
+unlike other speakers that don't do bubbles at all.
+Elton John did walls.
+When you do want the camera to record,
+the AI pin's trust light will turn on,
+which is ironic, given you should never trust someone wearing that many bracelets.
+You can hold up your hand to access some controls by a laser,
+but you can also hold up nuts like D's
+and ask the dongle,
+how much protein is this?
+How much protein is in D's nuts?
+It's unclear if this feature will work on anything the camera can see.
+Strangely, even though Chaudhri said the AI pin has a quote,
+it runs a Qualcomm Snapdragon chipset,
+and that means it's really fast.
+It erroneously listed the best places to see the next total solar eclipse
+as Exmouth, Australia and East Timor,
+which are the best places to see this year's eclipse back in April.
+Similar, easily provable errors were made
+during the unveiling of both Bing Chat and Google Bart,
+and you'd think there'd be a lesson here,
+but to be fair,
+Imran may have been sleep talking in the video.
+We can't tell.
+Humane will have until next year to fix the AI pin when it launches for $699 at $700,
+plus they required $24 a month subscription.
+I can't wait.
+I can.
+Pre-order.
+In more AI news,
+OpenAI blamed a DDoS attack for its periodic outages on Wednesday,
+according to a status page that doesn't exactly scream $29 billion company.
+Initially, OpenAI's CEO and backup video game character asset, Sam Altman, said,
+ChatGPT's new features were simply more popular than the company had anticipated.
+Turns out that popularity was actually malice,
+as misleadingly named hacktivist group Anonymous Sudan claimed responsibility for the attack.
+The next day, OpenAI became unpopular with best friend and possibly lover Microsoft
+when the company blocked its employees from using ChatGPT.
+You'd think it was a response to the attack,
+but Microsoft claims the block was an error,
+or maybe they don't feel the same connection anymore.
+These days, there's a lot more AI fish in the sea, after all.
+Samsung's newly announced Gauss.
+Gauss.
+Gauss can supposedly translate audio and text in real time.
+That's pretty hot.
+And Amazon says its Olympus AI's parameters are double the size of GPT-4's.
+We understand if you're having second thoughts, Microsoft.
+You're a trillion-dollar company.
+At some point, you'll leave your current AI wife for a younger model.
+Speaking of Amazon's massive assets,
+the company is now offering low-cost primary health care as a Prime membership benefit.
+Did your arm fall off?
+Prime members...
+Members can get same-day delivery directly to a surgical suite.
+Is this true or not?
+I can't...
+this is Black Mirror.
+I don't know.
+That's a joke, right?
+Yeah.
+Okay.
+Seriously, though, for an extra $9 a month or $100 per year,
+members can get 24-7 on-demand virtual care
+and schedule next-day or even same-day appointments
+at hundreds of primary care offices across the US.
+Now, the e-commerce giant already has a pay-per-visit 24-7 telehealth service
+called Amazon Clinic,
+but they craved more.
+So they casually spent $3.9 billion earlier this year
+to acquire primary care provider One Medical.
+With this acquisition and its previous buyout of Whole Foods,
+Amazon now controls sources of food and medicine.
+Two things literally we can't live without.
+Perhaps Amazon will get into the oxygen business next,
+buy a bunch of land covered in trees,
+call it the Amazon Forest,
+and then sue South America for copyright infringement.
+You did good today, sport.
+Come on,
+let's get you some Quick Bits.
+A federal judge has dismissed a class action lawsuit
+alleging that Honda, General Motors, Toyota, and Volkswagen
+violated Washington state privacy laws
+by using their onboard infotainment systems
+to intercept, record, and download text messages and call logs.
+Not because the judge determined they weren't collecting that information.
+In fact, they still are.
+It's because the law requires proof
+that plaintiff's reputations, personal safety, and businesses were threatened.
+Look, just because your neighbor is standing outside your bedroom window with a camera
+doesn't mean he's doing anything wrong, right?
+Prove it.
+Omegle, the randomized chat service best known
+for sketchy interactions between minors and adult strangers,
+is shutting down after settling a lawsuit
+alleging sketchy interactions between minors and adult strangers.
+It's the end of an era.
+I was one of those adult strangers.
+Just kidding.
+For the past 14 years,
+Omegle has been a popular source of entertainment,
+viral YouTube videos,
+and emotional trauma.
+The site was originally envisioned as a way to use the wide open nature of the internet
+to connect its users to new and varied ideas and experiences,
+something it achieved arguably too well.
+The ongoing Epic trial has revealed how much money Google has given potential competitors
+to convince them to launch their games on the Play Store.
+Activision Blizzard was given $360 million
+for all their games in 2020,
+and Epic turned down $147 million for Fortnite,
+opting instead to launch the Android version
+through its own website back in 2018.
+20 other developers were offered similar deals in 2019
+as part of Google's Project Hug.
+Bear hug.
+Google even cut special deals with Netflix and Spotify.
+I used to pride myself on the quality of my hugs,
+but now I just feel inferior.
+How can I even cuddle my wife anymore?
+Qualcomm and its partner Iridium announced an end to Snapdragon Satellite,
+the satellite communication service for Android that never even launched.
+Originally announced in January
+with a promise of being Apple's emergency SOS via satellite, but better,
+it seems smartphone manufacturers elected not to include the technology in their devices.
+Iridium says they'll try to partner with smartphone OEMs and other chip makers,
+but for now,
+we'll have to deal with Tim Cook's stupid smug face,
+handsome jerk.
+Oh, you don't have satellite?
+Well, that sucks for you.
+Barbara, let's go.
+And you've heard of Apple TV+, Disney+, and Paramount+.
+Get ready for NASA+.
+The streaming service recently launched by the space agency of the same name.
+It's available on Android, iOS, and many smart TVs,
+and offers award-winning original series ad-free
+for the low cost of actually nothing.
+It's actually free.
+It's completely free.
+But like,
+if you wanted to convince your local representatives
+to give them more money to the Artemis program,
+no pressure at all.
+It's just Prada spacesuits don't grow on trees, you know?
+And neither does tech news.
+So make sure you come back on Monday for another hearty helping.
+We'll make it with love and just a sous-son of sarcasm.
+It gives
+it more body.

2023-11-13 The EU Will Break Apple. [Hod69Y1aVlY].txt

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+Uh,
+you came here because you want tech news,
+and I know that.
+And that's why I have that ready for,
+I have it ready for you right here.
+It's just, one second.
+Apple doesn't want to allow iPhone users
+to install apps from outside of the app store, AKA side loading,
+but according to Mark Gurm's together strong Gurman,
+the company looks like it's doing the tech giant equivalent
+of gritting its teeth and wincing in anticipation
+of getting a very painful temporary tattoo.
+See, the EU's Digital Market Act requires gatekeeper companies like Google and Apple
+to open up their software ecosystems by March, 2024.
+The Gurman, financial filings from Apple,
+as well as code found in the iOS 17.2 beta,
+all point to Apple preparing to allow side loading on iPhones before that deadline,
+so in the next few months.
+However, unlike their rollout of USB-C on iPhones,
+which happened because of EU pressure,
+side loading may only be allowed in the EU itself.
+But while Apple is preparing to do the unthinkable,
+letting their users decide something for themselves,
+the trillion dollar company is reportedly also quietly cooking up a Hail Mary in the form of several appeals,
+challenging the EU's decision to label the iOS app store and iMessage as gatekeeper services.
+Apple doesn't think of itself as gatekeeping anything.
+And if they are, it's more like a girl boss gaslight situation.
+Like, wow, yes, queen.
+Constructive criticism isn't real.
+Anyway, get ready to provide a whole new level of tech support for your iPhone using friends.
+In other Apple news, concerns over the company's decision
+to limit the base model M3 MacBook Pro to eight gigabytes of RAM, sorry, unified memory,
+have been somewhat validated,
+according to YouTuber Max Tech.
+He put an eight gigabyte and a 16 gigabyte M3 MacBook Pro head to head,
+and found that, unsurprising to nearly everyone,
+the 16 gigabyte laptop enjoys a sizable performance boost over the eight gigabyte model,
+exporting photos and videos as much as three times faster,
+despite only having two times the remembering power.
+Now, enthusiasts only got more upset about Apple's decision to under-equip the base model MacBook Pro
+after the company's VP of worldwide marketing, Bob Borchers,
+totally borked himself by telling Billy Billy creator, Yee Lee
+that eight gigabytes of RAM on the M3 MacBook
+Pro is analogous to 16 gigabytes on other systems.
+Now, you can acknowledge that Apple's software and hardware optimization is high art,
+while also being glad you weren't drinking some delicious 2% milk when you heard Borchers claim.
+Because I changed my pants enough times in one day, okay?
+But hey, at least Apple used two separate NAND modules for the storage this time.
+Well,
+Apple asked for that.
+They don't care.
+Intel has been waiting its turn to be called out for some nonsense,
+so thank goodness that MSI released a BIOS update for its Z790 motherboards
+that enables support for the incredibly generic sounding
+Intel Application Optimization feature, or APO.
+The feature is actually pretty cool.
+Hardware Unboxed did some testing with their now updated MSI boards,
+and credited APO as a fix
+for the way Intel's efficiency cores, or E-cores, handle gaming.
+But despite sounding like something that should work on pretty much any Intel chip with efficiency cores,
+like the 12th and 13th gen lineups,
+APO only works on select 14th gen core processors.
+And when Hub asked Intel,
+what's the deal with that?
+Intel gave a bone chillingly corporate response.
+Intel has no plans to support prior generation products with application optimization.
+Hello?
+I'm a human being.
+I have feelings.
+Beep boop.
+Hardware Unboxed also asked Intel
+if they plan to support more than the only two games that work with APO right now,
+Metro Exodus and Rainbow Six Siege,
+to which Intel replied, yeah, probably.
+Quick Bits, man, they are, they're so cool.
+I'm in a rush today.
+I didn't have time to think of something amazing.
+Okay, well,
+NVIDIA has announced the H200,
+an upgraded version of the H1.
+The H200 GPU,
+which is so in demand for running AI right now
+that the US's dollar value might get tethered to it soon.
+The H200's specs appear to be largely similar to the H100's,
+except for the memory,
+which is upgraded from HBM3 to HBM3e,
+boosting memory bandwidth, clocks, and capacity.
+The H100 had 80 gigabytes of VRAM,
+while the H200 has 141.
+Think about all the things you could do with that.
+Like emulate 8.88 gigabyte M3 Macbook Pros
+Yeah, you're gonna do the math.
+RTX 4090s are still pouring into repair shops with melted power plugs
+more than a year after problems with the card's 12 volt high power connector were first reported,
+according to Alex from Northridge Fix on YouTube.
+He says his repair shop still gets about 20 to 25 4090s in per week,
+proving once and for all that the 4090 owners
+just didn't plug them in right, guys.
+You gotta push it all the way in.
+It's your fault.
+Thankfully,
+PCI SIG has now redesigned the connector,
+so hopefully future generations of financially questionable decision makers
+won't endure the suffering you have.
+It's not actually your fault.
+I was joking.
+Stop writing that comment.
+Australia's ports are reopening after being shut down by a massive cyber attack three days ago,
+according to DP World Australia,
+which is not related to what you're thinking of.
+It's actually the country's biggest ports operator,
+which still sounds...
+Damn it.
+The cyber attack caused huge delays and congestion,
+and some data was apparently stolen by the perpetrators,
+who are believed to be foreign state actors.
+But I reckon they should see whether the front fell off.
+Widely reported issues with SanDisk Extreme Pro SSDs
+are the result of hardware issues unfixable by any firmware update,
+according to data recovery company Atingo.
+Their managing director told Futurezone
+that some of the components SanDisk used are too big for their circuit boards,
+leading to unstable connections,
+which caused some components to pop off the board entirely,
+and not in a good way.
+I would be shocked and appalled by this
+if I didn't remember that SanDisk is owned by Western Digital.
+And Tesla's order agreement for the Cybertruck forbids owners from selling the polygonal vehicle for one year after it's delivered,
+unless you tell Tesla you want to sell it and give them a chance to buy it back from you.
+If they don't want to buy it back,
+they might give you written permission
+to sell it to a third party,
+like a hall pass,
+but for basic economic rights.
+If you violate this or any other provision in the agreement,
+Tesla says they may locate and disable the vehicle electronically.
+And really, I mean,
+this should all make sense if you bought a Cybertruck.
+It's not a normal truck.
+It's...
+It's ugly.
+But you're beautiful inside and out,
+and that's why I know you're gonna come back on Wednesday for more tech news.
+It's just who you are, you know.
+We love you for that.
+Please.